Hi guys….as you know I’m an Executive Coach and I deal with Executives and Managers everyday and it’s always amazing when I come across cases where you see from a distance how wicked humans can be to one another or how some bully others. Now the other side of that coin is that the person being bullied or treated badly could be falling short with their deliverables or performance and that is why they’re receiving the bad treatment, but there are ways to deal with someone you don’t respect or you’re impatient with because they’re not doing what is expected.
Instead of confronting the person and having a conversation with them to let them see what you’re seeing, humans take the cowardly route and try to “bad talk” the person, or complain to their boss or poison the person’s name with negative talk about them to everyone except the person themselves. Be brave and go to the person and have a serious conversation that gives everyone a win/win and not a win/lose. But that rarely happens. So what you have happening is a person is stressed because it seems as if everyone is coming down on them and the individual(s) who are either bullying or being negative are doing it because they’re dissatisfied with the person’s performance or lack of.
Communication is such a vital part of any organisation, relationship or family. People perceive things through their foggy lenses, so unless you explain and they can see where you are coming from they will treat you based on that perception. Of course there is also the other aspect that people are inadvertently selfish and want what they want. That is, everyone consciously or unconsciously has their own agenda, but some of us are able to put those agendas aside for the good of others or bend them or delay them for the good of others whereas some won’t do that for anyone. I call that selfishness and we all have a level of selfishness…me very much included.
I’ve had my times of doing what I wanted despite who it hurt because I wanted my satisfaction and didn’t even think about who and how bad it would hurt someone else. But you learn from those situations and hopefully you never do that again but life and humans are strange and we can go into that selfish mode at any time. Within an organisation that selfish mode shows its head often by many and that is where the conflicts occur, but it can be prevented through communication…having the uncomfortable conversations is what helps.
So lets not be mean to each other or at least consider how what you do will hurt someone you acre about and make the decision not to do it or put it off for a better and safer less painful time.We are going through enough challenges at this time in our lives and outside of Covid, Economic trials, crime, internal government disputes, marches (BLM), now we’re heading towards hurricane season….to me it feels like our planet’s rotation has sped up and now everything is happening faster….who knows????
I wanted to get that off my chest and say that we are all humans…whether black, white, indian, negro, mixed, rich, poor, educated, uneducated, we all bleed and we all bleed red, so maybe we should judge based on blood colour….maybe that might help us see everyone the same. Who know????We gotta get it right as humans, so I just wanted to share that.
Later guys, stay safe and be kind to one another, wear your mask, wash your hands, don’t touch your face and sanitise. Let’s fight a least one thing together…Covid.